Crossed the crazy line

Or maybe I’ve gone through the looking glass. I’ve always wanted to go as Alice for Halloween.

I think I’ve crossed the crazy line. Or, maybe I should say I’ve crossed MY crazy line. Everyone’s line placement is probably a little different.



I think the line was back there, back where I got conned, er, convinced to do Leadville. And then I convinced myself I could and should do it. I think that’s where that line was. I can’t really see it from here.

On the far side of the line, running a trail marathon with 2000 ft elevation gain at altitude (caldera marathon) became a run that I hoped to do pretty well in, but didn’t need to train for specifically. Geez, this is how I look at 5K races. Or, I should say, looked – on the other side of the crazy line. And now, this weekend, I’m running the Ghost town 38.5 – my longest run to date – and I’m not worried about the distance. I’m a little cautious and want to take it easy so as not to strain my Achilles again, but the distance seems like it will be fun, not hard. How can that be? How can I be at this place where running 38.5 miles seems natural? This disorientation, this sensation feels like when you’re climbing a long grade up. Instead of looking up regularly, you keep looking at the trail right in front of you. The trail looks the same, step after step, rocks, dirt, leaves – and you keep the same steady, maybe hypnotic, pace. Until, some unknown stimulus pulls your gaze from the trail, and you realize you’re at the top. And yet, looking down the long trail, it doesn’t seem like you actually covered that distance yourself. It’s bewildering, dizzying even.

I have done races that I still don’t really think I can do. That’s nuts, right? I’ve already done them, but I still have doubts about whether I can do them. The doubting part of me must still visit the other side of the crazy line.

I plot out a logical training progression – upping weekly mileage from my current 35 to 65 miles a week, and bumping up to 75 or 80 at least twice in the summer.  Here a race, there a race, and every week speed work. And then add in some afternoon hikes up mountains. Maybe some sessions on a stair climber if I can find one.

Once I finish the schedule and look at it laid out before me, it’s clear. There is nothing about this schedule that is logical.

Except that it is, given that I want to finish Leadville. Crazy.

Co’s dream:
We’re still in the Florida Keys on our week vacation. He wakes up and decides to go for a walk – it’s hot, it’s humid, and he doesn’t see any lizards. When he gets back, I’m in the kitchen at the rental.

Looking like I’ve just been for a run.

So he asks – did you go for a run?

To which I reply off-handedly, “yeah, I did a marathon this morning, while you were out walking.”